Breaking Habits

A/N: Happy Birthday,Violentserenity! We hope you have a fantastic day.

As ever, we do not own Twilight - it owns us.

ooOoo

Bench

Every day I see her sitting on that same bench, staring at the mural as if it holds life's answers. It's van Gogh's Starry Night, so I guess it’s possible.

Still, I can't help but wonder what draws her to it, day in and day out. I've never dared ask her, though.

Instead, I just watch from the window of my shop. By the time I close the doors at six, she's gone again.

Until today.

When I turn to head home, I'm surprised to find her still sitting there. Unable to help myself, I walk slowly up to her.


Nerve

As soon as I’m standing behind her, I freeze. I don’t know what to say, what to do, how to not look like some creeper stalking her from the shadows.

I start to turn on my heel when I hear her sigh. There’s something broken in that sound, something that draws me to sit on the bench beside her.

Large, brown eyes peer up at me from a pale, heart-shaped face, where her pink lips are drawn up in a slight ‘o’ of surprise.

“I’m sorry,” I say in a rush. “Is someone sitting here?”

“Oh… no,” she answers quietly.


Stammer

“I-I...” Closing my eyes briefly, I take a deep breath. “Sorry. I'm Edward... I..I work over there.”

I point at my little store, blushing as her gaze follows before returning to me.

“I'm Bella,” she answers, her voice quiet, but sure. She frowns a little. “You really work in a toy store?”

Nodding, I clear my throat, explaining how it used to be my father's, that we only sell hand-crafted toys, and that he taught me everything I know.

Bella listens patiently, but I detect none of the scorn I've come to expect from others over my choice of profession.


Interest

“Do you make the toys yourself?”

At her question, I feel my cheeks heat again. “S-some of them, but not most,” I admit.

She turns slightly toward me, resting her elbow on the back of the bench. I watch in fascination as her hand lifts, toying with her hair. “Really? What kinds of things do you make?”

“Puzzles, mostly.”

She arches an eyebrow with a curious look on her face, and I find myself talking more than usual. Anytime I start to wind down, she asks another question, wanting to know about painting and carving until, finally, there’s a lull.


Curious

Running my fingers through my hair, I clear my throat anxiously, my eyes darting around but always coming back to her. “So... can I ask you something?”

She nods.

“Why do you come here every day?”

Bella brushes her hair out of her face as she watches me, a small crease on the bridge of her nose. “How do you know I'm here every day?” she retorts.

My cheeks flame as I admit to having watched her for the past few weeks.

Now she's really gonna think I'm a stalker or something. I berate myself, unable to meet her gaze.


Sad

She looks away, staring at the mural again. I feel completely out of place, but I can’t think of anything that won’t just make this worse.

I finally decide to say goodbye and leave, but before I can force my mouth to open, she sighs.

“My dad took me to an art museum in Seattle when I was a kid. We went to a van Gogh exhibit, and I remember just being… in awe.”

“Of the paintings?” I ask quietly.

She gives a somber half-smile, her eyes still on the art. “No… that my dad was spending time with me.”


Explain

My heart breaks for her. I can't imagine not being close to my dad.

Bella blushes, shaking her head as she hurries to explain. “Oh, it's... I'm saying this wrong, I guess. Charlie was a great guy. Really. My parents divorced when I was really young, and I ended up moving around a lot with my mom. I didn't get much of a chance to really know him growing up.”

She stares at the mural again, adding quietly, “I wish I'd made the time to get to know him when I was old enough to decide. It's too late, now.”



Condolences

I’m torn between curiosity and a fear of prying too deeply. I turn to look at the mural, trying to see what she sees and hoping it gives me some insight into how to keep this conversation from ending before it really begins.

I clear my throat, and she turns to me expectantly.

Damn it.

“Ahh… I’m sorry to hear about your dad.” I say the first thing that comes to mind, which wouldn’t be so bad, except I follow it with, “How did he die?”

Bella’s eyes darken as she frowns slightly, glancing away.

Shit.

“I’m sorry,” I say.


Amends

God, now what? Please don't let her start crying...

My eyes flicker around the area, trying to come up with some way to fix my stupidity. Finding no real inspiration, I clear my throat again – a nervous habit I really wish I didn't have right now, as she looks at me again – and take a deep breath. “Bella, I'm sorry. F-forget I asked. It's none of my business, really.”

She tilts her head as I ramble on.

“Please, let me make it up to you? I-I...”

My eye falls on the coffee shop down the street. “Coffee!” I blurt out.


Coffee

Bella doesn’t say very much after agreeing to go with me. We stand side-by-side in silence as we wait for our turn to order. As I frantically try to think of something to talk about, I wonder if it wouldn’t have been better if I’d never met her.

But then I look down at her.

Her bottom lip is caught between her teeth, her brow is furrowed, and I want so badly to know what she’s thinking.

When we finally have our drinks in hand, I lead her to a small table in the corner and sit across from her.


Begin

We both sip our drinks in silence, and again I wonder if I should've left well enough alone.

Bella lowers her cup, holding it between her hands as she stares at it. Her voice is quiet, wavering on occasion as she explains that her father was the Chief of Police in Forks, Washington, and that he was gunned down by a drunk tourist with a chip on his shoulder.

“He died on the scene. I didn't even hear about it until after the funeral,” she whispers.

Before I can stop myself, I reach out and place my hand over hers.  
 

Comfort

I start to pull my hand back quickly, stammering, “I-I’m sorry…” but she turns her hand over, catching my fingertips.

When her eyes meet mine, she gives a quiet, sad smile. “Please?” she says simply.

I nod, relaxing slightly as I squeeze her hand. “Of course.”

Watching her for a moment, I try to work out what to say. “I’m so sorry about your father, Bella.” It’s simple and doesn’t say everything, but it says what I mean.

“Thank you,” she murmurs quietly. “I haven’t told anyone about that…”

Frowning, I run my thumb over the back of her hand.



New

She gives me a wan smile, running her fingers through her hair with her free hand. She glances away briefly then looks at me again. “I haven't been in Chicago very long, really. Only moved here a few weeks ago for my job. Not much of a choice,” she mutters.

She sighs and adds, “Every day, I go to work, then come here over lunch, then go to work again, and then straight home. I just haven't been up for getting out there, you know? And this,” she tilts her head toward the mural, “let's me feel closer to Charlie.”


Change

Asking about her father feels too personal, so I try a safer question. “How are you here now, then?”

She blushes and glances down. “Oh. I… ahh…” Exhaling heavily, she looks up at me with embarrassment. “Please don’t laugh?”

“Of course not.”

“Charlie… god, this is harder to say than I thought… he didn’t have much of a life. Just work, sleep, and sometimes fishing. That’s it. And I… I’m too much like him. So I took today off, determined to just do something. And where do I end up?” She scoffs, shaking her head. “At the mural. Alone. Again.”


Amused

Grinning, I squeeze her hand to catch her attention. “No you didn't. You ended up here, having coffee with me,” I say gently.

She smiles, her shoulders lifting slightly at the thought. After a minute, she nods. “You're right. I did; didn't I?”

“Yes, yes… you did.” I glance at the clock and decide to go for broke. Taking a deep breath, I ask, “And if you're up for it, maybe you can have dinner with me, too? My treat.”

Her lips twitch even as she narrows her eyes and tilts her head. “Hmm, suppose that'd be the sensible thing...”


Tease


“But I don’t know if I should.”

My smile fades at her words. “Oh, okay.” Taking a pull from my coffee, I try to hide my disappointment. It isn’t until I feel the stab of rejection that I realize that I’d thought things were going well between us.

“You might be some crazy stalker or something.”

I look up quickly, my mouth dropping open as I struggle for words. She’s watching me with a tiny smile that matches the mischievous gleam in her eyes.

When I frown at her, she laughs softly. “I’m sorry… I couldn’t resist. I’d love to.”


Plan

The relieved sigh that escapes me has Bella laughing and reaching for my hand again. “So where are you taking me, then?”

We go back and forth for a few minutes before settling on Indian. Finishing our coffees, we get up and toss our empty cups away.

I hold the door open for her, earning me a warm smile as she passes. When I catch up with her, she takes my hand in hers, entwining our fingers. “Thank you, Edward, for reaching out to me.”

Emboldened by her actions, I raise her hand to my lips, smiling. “My pleasure, Bella.”